Another early wake up call

June 27, 2008 at 3:43 am

Good God, I just can’t catch a break on Fridays!  This is the second Friday in a row that I have woken up at 3:45-4 in the morning and have not been able to fall back to sleep.  Hmmm, I guess I’ll just shower and go into work early.  I may as well get paid if I have to be wide awake!

Sleepy Kerry

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Okay, one more post today…

June 26, 2008 at 7:43 pm

…but this is mostly a vent.  Can I just say how damn annoying it is to hear that a couple is trying to conceive when their marriage is held together by a small thread?  ARGH!!!!!!!!!  Soooo annoying!  You know why it’s annoying?  Because, statistically they have a much better chance at getting pregnant than Jeff and I ever did, and it’s always our luck that these type of people ALWAYS get knocked up the first or second month (or they complain that it’s “taking too long, waaaaaah, waaaaaah, waaaaaah”)!

And one more minor annoyance if I may…

If you have a baby, or babies, please for the love of GOD do not tell me that I’m “lucky” because I don’t have to deal with baby puke, poop, pee, excessive crying, lack of sleep, or anything else that is synonymous with having a baby.  I’m not saying I won’t complain when all of this happens to Jeff and I (that would be anything short of a miracle), but thinking that this is something that’s acceptable to say to someone in my position is just plain ignorant. 

Ugh.  Vent(s) over.

Kerry

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Oh! I almost forgot!

at 7:29 pm

Happy 4th Anniversary to Marty and LeAnn!!!!!!!!

Hope you had a fantastic day!  We love you!

J&K

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:::tapping fingers impatiently on table:::

at 7:23 pm

Where the hell is she?

Who, you ask?  Freakin’ Aunt Flo.  You know…the “crimson wave”, “monthly visitor”, “riding the cotton pony” (hehehe, that one takes me back to high school when I used to be immature, hehehe), “end of sentence”?  For those of you who still don’t get it – where the hell is my period?!?!?!?  Not once in the last three years have I actually been excited for my stupid period to come.  Moody, bitchy attitude?  Check.  Cravings for fat, calories, and grease?  Check.  Cramps?  Bring ‘em on!  I’m ready!  Because guess what?  When my period starts, I get to call the IVF nurses at Conceptions to get our “game plan” for the the next few weeks.

I really don’t know much about what our game plan is going to consist of.  Our RE outlined everything on several crisp, white sheets of paper, but I was so overwhelmed (and excited) at the time that I really wasn’t paying that much attention to detail.  I got the basics, but the specifics are a little blurry.  I have asked my friend, Roxy, to tell me all about her time line with Dr. S, but she reminded me that every person is different, and what happened with her time line likely won’t happen with mine.  Dammit!  Why didn’t I pay closer attention?  Why didn’t I bring my little tape recorder?  Why didn’t I ask Jeff to pay closer attention to those details (the guy has a photographic memory I tell you!)?  Poopy.

Oh well.  I have plenty of stuff to distract me until that day comes (which will likely be this weekend, just so you know).  Work has been INSANELY busy the last few weeks, which is a good thing because (a) it means that my job is safe for now and (b) it makes the day go by really fast.  Lately, I haven’t been sleeping that well at night – call it practice for parenthood - my mind has just been racing, racing, racing.  Like, it won’t stop.  It’s annoying as all hell, but what do you do?  I did take this herbal muscle relaxant that my acupuncturist gave me both Tuesday and Wednesday nights, and I slept like a little baby.  It was awesome.  Then today, I did a little research on Google, and found out that one of the main ingredients in this all-natural herbal muscle relaxant/sleep aid is no bueno if you are trying to have a baby.  But wait!  I dug a little more (to find another link on how bad it was for me), and I found research that shows that Valerian Root can be beneficial to those struggling with infertility.  WTF?  Seriously!  Don’t fuck with a girl who needs 8 hours of sleep every night to function at a normal pace.  So, if there are any doctors who are reading this, or if anyone feels like doing some “real” research for me, I would appreciate some feedback.  The herbal relaxant is called Formula 303.  Website is http://www.formula303.com/.  Thanks a million.

Crap, gotta run.  I forgot I need to fill out my performance review for work…jealous?

Kerry

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F.A.Q.'s

June 25, 2008 at 7:02 pm

What is infertility?
Infertility is a disease of the reproductive system that impairs one of the body’s most basic functions:  the conception of children (definition on asrm.org).  Usually when a couple tries naturally to have a child for a year to no avail (or if she is 35 or older, 6 months), she is considered infertile.
 
Is it Jeff’s fault, or Kerry’s?
Infertiles get this question ALL THE TIME, and it is so rude.  Why we are talking openly and honestly about this, we’ll answer that question.  Jeff has a little issue with his sperm’s morphology (meaning the shape and maturity of the sperm), and Kerry has a blood clotting disorder that may or may not be making it more difficult to get and stay pregnant (there isn’t a lot of research on this yet).  So I guess you could say that it’s a shared issue, which we actually prefer.

Why don’t you just relax, and let it happen naturally?

If only it were that easy.  Guess what?  We tried that, the first year.  It didn’t work.  Unfortunately, because infertility is a medical condition, no amount of relaxing is going to just make it disappear.  This is one of the most hurtful, insensitive things to say to a couple who is struggling with getting pregnant, but a lot of people don’t realize that.  It’s okay though, we’re here to teach you!

Okay, what are more “hurtful, insensitive” things that people have said to you?

Where to begin…

“If you just take a vacation, maybe it will happen…(yeah, if only we could afford a vacation)”, “it will happen in time…(uh…yeah…when?)”, “it will happen when God says it’s time…(so does that mean that God thinks it is time for all of those teens and crackheads to get pregnant then?)“, “I have a sister/friend/cousin/girlfriend who just stopped trying and – BOOM – she got pregnant! (that’s fantastic, good for her!)“, “I have a sister/friend/cousin/girlfriend who started the adoption process and – BOOM – got pregnant! (adoption isn’t for everyone)“, “if you didn’t think about it so much, maybe it would happen…(it’s a little hard not to think about it all the time, but if you have any suggestions on how to do so, we’re open to hearing them)”.  We could go on and on, but I don’t think you all need that.  Just know that the best thing to say to someone who is struggling with infertility is, “I’m so sorry for what you are going through.”

Isn’t this a financial burden on you?

Yes.  A big one.  We won’t bore you with figures, but Kerry could have her student loans paid off, and be driving a much nicer car for the amount of money we have spent on infertility treatments.  Depressing?  Oh yeah.  But we had to try what we had so desperately believed would work.  The only regret that we really have is not moving forward with in-vitro a little sooner.  Thankfully, Kerry’s new job does have some infertility coverage (only $5K, but that’s better than the $0K that our old insurance offered us), so this is definitely the right time.  Thankfully, Kerry’s parents offered us a ring that has a very sizable diamond in it to try to sell to pay for our IVF.  It’s very depressing to think about having to sell the diamond from a family heirloom to finance the possibility of getting pregnant and having a baby, but if it works, it will all be worth it.

If we think of anymore questions you may want answered, we will certainly blog about them – and if there is a question you have always been afraid to ask us, now is the time!  We are an open book, ask away!

J&K

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Hello =)

at 4:34 am

A little background on why we started this blog…

A little warning before we start – if you don’t want to know TMI (sometimes very personal and in-depth TMI) about us, I would just forget all about this blog.  We will make no apologies for any over-sharing or making you feel uncomfortable because we are talking about artificial insemination, sperm analysis, or how much Kerry hates feeling like a human pin-cushion.  For far too long, infertility has been this hush-hush, taboo thing that most people are too scared or too embarrassed to talk about.  Well, not us.  Sadly, infertility has become part of who we are, so why not educate others on what 1 out of every 6 couples face in their lifetime?

As most of you know, we have been trying for a baby for a while now.  A long while.  We tried the “old-fashioned” way for a little over a year, and began taking medication (prescribed by Kerry’s obgyn) to “boost” my ovulation shorty thereafter.  When that didn’t work, we decided it was time to seek the help of a RE (reproductive endocrinologist).  RE’s are highly qualified fertility doctors – they have all completed a residency in obstetrics and gynecology, and most have completed three additional years of training in reproductive endocrinology. 

We started with CRE (Colorado Reproductive Endocrinology) in the spring of 2007.  Our RE was Dr. Trout, or as Jeff calls her, “The Laughing Hyena” (she had the weirdest laugh…).  After an ASSLOAD of bloodwork, paperwork, ultrasounds, and a few SA’s (semen analysis), we tried three (orally) medicated IUI’s (intra-uterine insemination) to no avail.  We didn’t really like the quality of care (or lack thereof) that we were getting at CRE, so we moved about a block away to…

…CCRM (Colorado Center for Reproductive Medicine).  Our RE there was Dr. Minjarez, and we liked her instantly (although she made Kerry cry pretty much the entire initial consult appointment).  We did several more tests with CCRM, and then we were ready to go with IUI #4 when Kerry went in for a baseline ultrasound, and she had two big ass cysts on her ovaries.  Cysts = no go for fertility treatments.  We had taken a 6-month break from fertility treatments (you know, just “trying to relax” like everyone suggested, and yes, you are sensing sarcasm here), so we were pretty bummed.  The next month we got the go ahead, and began the oral meds and intra-muscular injections for IUI #4.  Two weeks after we completed IUI #4 we got a BIG FAT “Not Pregnant” on a digital pregnancy test.  We were crushed.  We thought this was it.

On to RE #3.  Nope, we’re not kidding. 

We decided since we weren’t getting anywhere with IUI’s (and research shows that doing more IUI’s doesn’t necessarily increase your chances of success), we were ready to tackle the king (or queen) of all infertility treatments – IVF.  In-vitro fertilization.  Holy shit.

Last Friday, June 20th, we had our IVF consult with our new doc, Dr. Swanson, at Conceptions.  Several factors contributed to us switching RE’s, again.  One was success rates.  According to sart.com, Conceptions success rate for IVF in my age group was 11% higher than that of CCRM (which is supposed to be the place for IVF in Colorado) – 11%!!!!!  That’s huge.  Another factor was that we personally know several people who have seen Dr. Swanson for IVF – all of whom have had successful pregnancies and/or children to show for them.  That’s huge.  There are several other reasons that we wanted to explore other options, but you know the old term, “if you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all”?  Yeah.

More to come…need sleepy.

J&K

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