:::taps microphone::: Is this thing on???

May 24, 2010 at 1:26 pm

Oh man.  I never, in a million years, thought I would go FOUR WEEKS without posting anything on our blog – although I have to admit that it has been nice not feeling guilty or obligated to post pictures, stories, etc, every week!  So many things have happened in the last month – from my sis moving to Denver (YAY!), which I partially blame on my blogging hiatus, to Max and Wes turning 15 months old and Wes starting to WALK while I was in Puerto Rico on a girls trip (video to follow). 

I should add that while I was super bummed that Weston decided to start full-on walking while I was out of the country, I was super excited that little Max decided not to let his “little” brother show him up on the walking front.  Two days after I got back from PR, Max not only started to stand on his own – but he also started walking!  What a trip!  My mom was there to witness his first steps, and it was just about the cutest thing in the world.  =)  Now, both boys are just walking everywhere, although Max is a little more apprehensive than his “little” brother.

I put “little” in quotations because even though Wes is technically the younger brother (by a whole whopping minute), he most certainly isn’t the “little” one.  The boys had their 15 month appointment last Friday, and holy cow – I knew Wes was a little more “solid”, but sheesh!

Max @ 15 months – 19 lbs, 11 oz, 30 1/2 inches long

Wes @ 15 months – 22 lbs, 9 oz, also 30 1/2 inches long

If I’m being honest, going into their appointment I was a little concerned with both of the boys’ growth (since their 12 month appointment), but Dr. B put my mind at ease when he kindly reminded me that they are technically only 12.5 months old if we’re going by their “adjusted” age.  He was also completely floored that both of them were not only just taking steps, but full-on walking – I was beaming with pride as he was gushing about how “advanced” our little 30-weekers are.  They were being little hams – making their pediatrician laugh…and they were big troopers when they got their shots – probably because their Aunt Kristy and I promised them ice cream if they were “big boys”.  =)

And more pictures, because I don’t have much free time today (or any day really)…

Max and Wes’s first experience with “dipping” their food…

Their new sand and water table…

Some outside photos taken Mother’s Day weekend…

In beautiful Puerto Rico with my sis…

 And finally, our little Weston, making his first “walk” around the living room…

Filed under Uncategorized

This Post Currently Has 3 Responses »

March For Babies 2010

April 28, 2010 at 8:41 am

The March of Dimes March for Babies was last Saturday, April 24th – just two short days before what “should have been” Max and Wes’s first birthday.  It was amazing…and despite the weather, there was quite a big turnout.  There were only three of us for Team Weemmax, but we had a great walk – talking about our preemie miracles, where they came from, and how far they’ve come.  I met Apolonia (she goes by Apol, sounds like Apple) at our Swedish Hospital NICU Support Group meeting – her son, J.T., was born more than 13 weeks early due to severe pre-eclampsia.  He is now a happy, healthy (almost) 16 month old, and just cute as can be!

After the (coooold) walk, we headed over to Steve’s Snappin’ Dogs to celebrate and hang out with friends.  If I’m being honest, I was pretty disappointed in the turnout – a lot of people who had said they would come (at least stop by) never did.  We were there until a little after 2, so if we missed anyone, I apologize.  It was great to see the people who did show up – (Grandpa) Art, Janet, Eric, Meghan and her kiddos, Tiff, Rich, and baby Kendall, and our (Mon/Wed) nanny, Hailey, and her husband, Dan.  Meghan was going to do the walk with us, but because she has three kiddos (two of which are identical monoamniotic twin girls born at 27 weeks), and the weather was craptastic, she just met us afterward.

Thank you SO INCREDIBLY MUCH to all who came out in the crap weather to support us, and a HUGE THANKS to those who made donations in Team Weemmax’s name!  We couldn’t have done it without you (especially you, Sock!)!

Filed under Uncategorized

This Post Currently Has 4 Responses »

This one’s for Uncle Pete…

April 20, 2010 at 9:32 pm

…who gave us these onesies when Max and Wes were just 4-5 months old.  At the time, as you can imagine, they looked gigantic!  I think our little “things” look absolutely adorable in them now – thanks Uncle Pete!

And just because it’s hilarious, a photo taken after bathtime tonight.  Both Max and Wes have HORRIBLE cradle cap, so I lubed up their heads with some ointment, hoping it does the trick.  I don’t know about helping the dry scalp, but oh my gosh, could our boy BE any more adorable?!?! 

Filed under Uncategorized

This Post Currently Has 2 Responses »

Reflections (SUPER long)

at 9:11 pm

April 26th, 2009, was my due date.  If Max and Wes would have made it to “full term”, they likely would have been just a week or two old at that point.  Instead, they were coming up on their 10 week “birthday”.  This time last year I was on auto-pilot…in fact, if I had a dollar for every time I’ve said, “I’m fine”, “I’m just really tired”, ” and “I’m feeling a lot better, thanks”…oh my gosh…I’d never have to work again.

Yeah, I wasn’t “fine”.  I wasn’t “just really tired”.  And I certainly wasn’t “feeling a lot better”.

I don’t really think I know what exactly it was that I was feeling.  It was such a complex combination of emotions that I couldn’t even talk to my own husband about it.  To this day, Jeff still doesn’t know a lot of what I was really feeling for weeks and months on end after our sweet boys were born.  The only people that really know are my amazing therapist and I, and now that I’m “all better”, I’d kind of like to keep it like that.  I will say last fall/winter I was in a bad, dark, lonely place, and there were times when I seriously contemplated ending my life – whether that meant walking out on my family and my marriage, or literally ending my life. 

Things got a lot worse for me at the beginning of the year when I got a call from my sister, my best friend in the whole wide world, at four o’clock in the morning.  A phone call that early in the morning is never good.  And it wasn’t good…at all.  After 7 1/2 years of marriage (and 10 years together), my sister had just got the news that her husband, the man who swore to me that he would never ever ever hurt my baby sister, had been unfaithful.  I realize that it is ridiculously selfish of me to admit that this was a huge blow for me, but oh my gosh.  I was literally (physically) sick when I got off the phone.  I mean, if Joel could cheat on Kristy, what was to stop Jeff from doing it to me?? 

That’s the time when I decided that I simply had to get mental help, or the deep sense of dispair I had been feeling wasn’t going to get any better.  I got a recommendation from my friend, Liz, who had heard of this therapist who specialized in EMDR, and I made an appointment that week.  I had weekly therapy sessions that included me reliving some really horrifying moments… 

The moment Jeff and I signed paperwork stating that both of our boys may not make it through the surgery

that I might not make it through the surgery

the days and weeks I spent alone and afraid when I was on bed rest

desperate for someone to talk to, but not knowing that it was okay to talk about what I was afraid of

the moment we were told that my water had broken

and our babies were coming

the first sight of “Baby A”

 and a minute later, “Baby B”

and the sight of them being whisked away…Jeff following closely behind.

The days and weeks I spent alone and afraid when our boys were in the NICU

desperate to believe everyone

the doctors, the nurses, the social worker, our friends

when they said everything was going to be okay

the moment they told us that our babies were coming home

first Maxwell

then Weston

and the sight of them at home where they were meant to be…perfection.

The days and weeks and months following where I felt alone and afraid

all over again

desperate to be the mom that I knew I could be

the wife I used to be

the visions of dead babies and everything that could have gone wrong

but hadn’t

haunted me…for so long.

These moments were replaced with thoughts of what I wished had happened, what really happened, and what was going to happen with our future – our family’s future.  EMDR therapy is intense and it’s so.damn.hard to go through at times (especially when you’re suffering from PTSD), but it saved my life.  It saved my marriage.  And without sounding overly dramatic, it saved me from a darkness that I was afraid was going to take over my life.  Those who know me know that I am not a religious person – not in the least – but there hasn’t been a day that’s gone by since “graduating” from my therapist where I haven’t silently given thanks to God for seeing me through this time in my life.  Knowing that I’m okay, that my family is going to be okay, and that it’s okay to feel the way I did is so reassuring – it keeps me going when life gets hard.

If you’ve made it through this novel, thank you so much for taking the time to read my ramblings – it really means a lot to me.  And if you think you or someone you know could benefit from EMDR and want to know more, you can shoot me an email and I’d be happy to answer any and all questions you may have – kerry@ourstorkgotlost.com.

 

 

 

Filed under Uncategorized

This Post Currently Has 5 Responses »

Post March for Babies Celebration

April 19, 2010 at 8:37 pm

After the March of Dimes March for Babies on the 24th, we invite our friends, family, and supporters to join us at Steve’s Snappin’ Dogs, located on the corner of Colfax & Monroe.  The owners, Steve and Linda Ballas, are friends of ours, and generously offered to help us out in our fundraising efforts.  With the coupon below, 15% (pre-tax) of each Steve’s Snappin’ Dogs purchase will be donated to the March of Dimes, on behalf of Team Weemmax.  Not only is it worth it to give back to a great cause, but the food at Steve’s is THE BOMB.  If you like chili and coleslaw, you have to try the Atlanta Slaw Dog (we get it with the flash-friend green beans & carrots and a refreshing limeade) – it’s our favorite.  They also make an amazing burger, and have several vegetarian options, too.  Steve’s is very family friendly, so bring the kids and get them a balloon animal and a chocolate-dipped banana.  Steve’s is also adult friendly, so grab yourself a nice, cold beer with your dog!!

We will be arriving after the walk, at approximately 11 a.m.  The coupon is good from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m., but if there is a large turnout of people with coupons after 2 p.m. they may still honor the coupon (to donate 15% of the ticket total to charity).  Simply click the coupon below, print it out, and present it to the cashier when you pay.  It’s that easy.

It’s a great cause, a great meal, and a great way to support an amazing organization as well as a local restaurant!

Steve’s Snappin’ Dogs is located at 3525 East Colfax Avenue.

This event has been approved by the March of Dimes.

Filed under Causes

This Post Currently Has 2 Responses »

Holy Messy, Batman!

April 12, 2010 at 10:40 am

So – we decided to give Max and Wes some of our pasta last night – they LOVED it!  Luckily, we made the decision to take their shirts off first, and boy were we thankful we did that!  We were debating giving them a bath to clean off the sunscreen from their first trip to the Denver Zoo (pics to follow), but after the mess they made of themselves (as seen in the videos below) we knew we couldn’t put it off until morning.  Next time they have pasta, we’re stripping them down to their diapers.

YouTube Direct

YouTube Direct

Filed under Videos

This Post Currently Has 5 Responses »